Splatter and Dodge
Season 1, Episode 3
Air date December 3, 2016
Written by OliverDuckandToad11
Directed by OliverDuckandToad11
Episode guide
Percy's Oil Spill
Old and Wise

Splatter and Dodge is the third episode of the first season.


Workload had been increasing greatly on the North Western Railway. Arthur was feeling exhausted and was in serious need of help on the Norramby Branch Line, while a permanent station pilot at Tidmouth was still to be decided. The Fat Controller was aware of this and one day, he had an idea of what he could do to prevent all the problematic circumstances.

One morning at Brendam Docks, Salty was shunting a goods train in line for Murdoch when he heard the horn of a ship blasting in the distance that was approaching the ferry dock. As Salty squinted at the ship, he saw what looked to be an engine on board. "Argh me hearty, I think we have visitors." he said to Cranky.

"Visitors? What, on that ship?" asked Cranky.

"Yes, me hearty," replied Salty, "there be an engine on board, no wait… there's two engines! Shall we go and meet them?"

"Your choice, not mine," murmured Cranky under his breath.

"I'll take that as a yes then," chuffed Salty and he rolled over to the ferry dock. As the ship pulled into the dockside, there emerged two BR Class 08 diesels who looked very identical to one another, one was purple and the other was green. The engines didn't look familiar to Salty whom the latter had no idea of who they were.

"Ahoy shipmates, welcome to the Island of Sodor!" Salty introduced as the two diesels rolled the shore. "This is Brendam Docks, I'm Salty the dockyard diesel and-"

"We've been here before you know," interrupted the purple diesel snarkily.

"Yeah, before you ever came around," retorted the green diesel, "and why do you have to speak and act like a pirate?"

"Yeah, you sound awfully stupid!"

Salty felt offended by the diesels' words, he hated it when engines questioned him of his pirate nature. Despite all this, he still wanted to make the diesels feel welcome. "No questioning of that matey," he said sternly, "anyway, who might you lads be?"

"I'm Splatter," said Splatter.

"And I'm Dodge," purred his twin. "But together we are…"

"Splatter and Dodge!" finished the two diesels together.

"Um, Splatter and Dodge," pondered Salty. "It reminds me of a story." Cranky just rolled his eyes and sighed. "Anyhow, do you want me to show you shipmates around?"

"Ah, no thank you," replied Splatter.

"We can manage alone," said Dodge firmly, "besides we have visited here before, just you wait!"

"Well, if you say so me hearties, good luck then," replied Salty. "Don't get lost on the way. Har-Har-Har-Har!"

"Wait! Before we leave," interrupted Splatter, "I have a question to ask you pirate diesel, or whatever your name is…"

"Oh, didn't you hear? I'm Salty the dockyard diesel- Well, just go with Salty."

"Okay Salty," wheezed Splatter, "my question is, do you like steam engines?"

"Steam engines, of course!" Salty exclaimed. "They're very kind and friendly, and hardworking too."

"You traitor!" snarled Splatter. "How dare you be friends with those out-of-date worthless steam kettles!"

"They're supposed to be foes, not friends!" added Dodge furiously. "You're a disgrace to the diesel army."

"The what?" exclaimed Cranky in confusion.

"Stay out of it, you!" boomed Splatter. "As for you pirate diesel, you and your pirate accent make me sick!" and with that, Splatter and Dodge oiled out of the docks. "Stupid Betrayers!"

Salty, however, was left alarmed and shocked until he eventually spoke up. "Was it, something I… said?"

"Huh, clearly was," snorted Cranky. "Who do those diesels think they are? Telling me to stay out of it, if I saw those two again I'd pick them up with my hook and throw 'em into the water."

"Argh let's not go to that stage, me hearty," advised Salty